Mental illness can make us feel so lost.
It makes us feel like we have lost ourselves and like we will never return, consumed by despair and hopelessness.
It’s easy to think when we are depressed that this is life. This is how it is now. We are lost in this hole and we can’t get out. There is no way out and we are now lost in this blackness.
This is where suicidal thoughts creep in. When we have lost hope. We believe there is no way out, no one can help. Nothing is ever going to make us feel good again and our old selves are like a dream that happened once upon a time.
The truth is you are still in there. It doesn’t feel like it I know. I have been there so many times. That feeling of black that is so hard to explain, I understand it. I understand that feeling. It’s an inexplainable feeling that you can only describe to others in a way that makes it seem so trivial compared to what it actually feels like because there are no words for that feeling. The only things that comes close is utter hopelessness.
The thing is hope knows no ends. it’s not like a day of the week or something where there is a clear beginning and a clear end. Hope just is. It’s always there because none of us know what’s round the corner. Literally tomorrow could be that day that things start to turn around, even if it doesn’t feel like it today.
As long as your heart beats there is hope. As long as there is hope there is purpose. Even is you don’t feel hope it’s still there, lurking around that corner which means that you always have purpose. A reason to fight.
You are still in there, you have just been separated in this fog and blackness but it does not mean they have gone and they could be closer to coming back to you than you think. Never give up, just hold on and you will see that you will find your true self again. It just takes time for them to find their way back to you.
This letter is for you.