We all, I think try and hold back emotions, our true feelings and selves sometimes but more often than not this will find a way of exploding.
Recently with the stress of having to cancel my event through what I felt what lack of support, understanding, ticket sales, my partner losing his job, health issues, and general life stress it all exploded in to a cluster fuck of shit. One big explosion of emotion that took my feet from underneath me.
I am still not 100% and the level of pure anxiety from the aftermath of everything recently is still lingering and while I may simmer for a while, it it is taking the smallest things to bring that back to the boil.
Everything is uncertain at the moment from where I am going to where I am going to live, the fact rent can’t be paid, I may not be able to continue on to level 3 of counselling course that I have worked so hard to complete level 2 due to funds, what is going to happen to us a family……It’s fairly overwhelming right now but one thing I have learned recently is to choose who I work with closely in relation to mental health projects and also that melting in to a million pieces is okay, it’s necessary sometimes. We are human, we all have limits – you have limits. Don’t ever think that breaking and crying and despairing is weak or isn’t okay somehow, because it IS okay, because you, me, all of us, we are in the words of Rag ‘n’ Bone Man “Only Human After all”
“I’d love to write a book”
I had always wanted to write a book. Specifically one about my own journey through mental illness and a childrens picture book. I didn’t know where to start. Little old me couldn’t do that, right?!
I am so excited to say that I have just signed a contract to publish my childrens picture book “Felix The Fox And His Awesome Odd Socks” through Beercott Books
The story aims to promote self acceptance, diversity and positive mental health amongst young children – Something that I feel very passionately about.
This comes a week or so after my book In Bloom Not broken went live for purchase via Amazon (the paper back will be added shortly if you prefer a real book to hold!)
Since doing this, a lot of people have said to me “I’d love to write a book” or “I wouldn’t know where to start”……Let me tell you now – I didn’t either!
I have made this short video to touch on this and to say you can do whatever you want to do! Just go for it!
Writing a book is an amazing, scary thing!
In Bloom Not Broken – My Journey through mental illness is now available on Amazon!
I wanted to do a video updating what has been going on for me lately and to talk a bit about writing a book and how it’s difficult to please everone. It’s an impossible task and when writing yoir story it is just that – your story, your perspective and the only way to go about that is to own it and roll with it!
Firstly apologies for my quietness, I have had a HORRIBLE flu plus a kidney infection on top making one poorly Katie for a couple of weeks that has left me with Post Viral Fatigue Syndrome and wonderful continuous IBS issues which has just totally wiped me out and left me struggling to do much of anything at all which in the land of me who likes to be constantly active and creative has managed to sink some feelings of depression and anxiety in to the mix!
However on a much more positive note I am super excited (and nervous) to day that my book In Bloom Not Broken is now available on Amazon in ebook format and the paperback will also be available soon!
Amazon UK HERE
Amazon US HERE
This is so exciting as this is something I have wanted to do for so long but I had to wait until I was in the right place to be able to go through my life, feelings and thoughts with great honesty to wriye the book I wanted it to be and that included going through 10 diaries filled with raw emotion and feelings to add to the book.
I wanted it to be raw, honest, no heirs and graces to really let people inside the mind of someone struggling with mental illness and for those struggling themselves to be able to relate in a real way that would show they are not alone with their feelings and thoughts including those that may feel embarrassing or shameful. I wanted it to be something that would offer hope to others that things can get better even when that seems totally impossible and you no longer want to live if you just hold on.
It’s a scary thing to bare your soul, share diary entries and aspects of your life that are so personal that for a long time I was ashamed of. I am not ashamed anymore though and I hope this book will allow others to feel the same and get something from it.
It would mean the absolute world me if you could support my journey and have a read! If you do buy it and like it please do leave a review as they really help. I would love to hear what you think once you have read it so feel frew to contact me!
I never thought i’d actually write a book and would like to say a HUGE thank yoi to Eliezer Tristan Publishing who believed in my story.
I also want to say that this shows you can do anything you put your mind to. You really can if you just go for it. Don’t let anyone tell you you can’t. If I can do it so can you! Never give up on yourself or your dreams ♡
One of my main mental health awareness goals for 2019 has been to hold an event.
I think so often it’s easy to focus on the negatives of mental illness that we forget about those out there that struggle, battle their own brains everyday but go on to help others.
I want to create an event that recognises those people, that recognises those one in a million professionals and that allows people to share their stories to offer hope to others.
I have been lucky enough to have been given a complimentary venue from the Bierkeller in Birmingham which is amazing seen as even Solihull and Birmingham Mental Health Foundation Trust woukd not offer their own venue/function room for this event, telling me that that had yearly financial targets to hit…. (Shocking I know, this is the mental health trust for the whole of solihull and Birmingham!)
There will be many more costs however and while my usual projects are funded from my own pocket with the occasional very kind donation, this project I will need some support with.
Unfortunately it doesn’t fit the criteria for any finding that I have looked at so I’m looking for your help!
This event will benefit not only those in Birmingham or those that attend but I hope as I have found through my other projects those further afield that read about it, hear about it to show that you CAN overcome, you CAN achieve and that there is hope.
I would really appreciate any help and 100% of all donations will go towards making this event happen!
Please see my fundraising page here
I am super chuffed that in the last couple of days two of my pieces have been shared by the Huffington Post and The Mighty.
I think its so easy to assume as one human, just little old us we can’t possibly make a difference to this big wide world.
I am starting to challenge that within myself and think that maybe just maybe I can. We can. Not matter small it is, no matter what it is we choose to do to raise awareness, to be heard that it’s possible with a little hard work and determination and regarding mental health I have that in bucket loads oozing from my pores and I am DETERMINED to be a voice for those with mental illness.
My little tree of hope project was so simple. It cost me about £50 which I was more than happy to spend if it bought some hope to someone out there and that it did. It was also picked up on twitter with currently over 20k views and messages from others wanting to do the same, that means it not only impacted those walking past it in my local park but it also inspired people far and wide and it’s something that could be replicated so easily to offer hope and comfort and this gives ME hope.
The tree of hope was also picked up by the huffington post and you can see the article HERE
One of my favourite blog pieces was also picked up by The Mighty, it was one of my favourites as it was regarding the thing that I feel the most passionate about regarding mental health and that is treatment.
It’s a letter to mental health professionals from me and what i’d like them to know, on behalf of all mental health patients. You can see that article HERE
So please do carry on your own projects, your own awareness activities, they DO make a a difference, we CAN make a difference and as I always say. Don’t be ashamed of your story. it will inspire others. So keep writing, sharing and inspiring my beauties because our voices matter.
New year is a time of new starts, dreams and goals but what if you don’t know where you’re heading? That’s okay!
New year can seem like an expanse of time, especially if you feel lost.
My final video of 2018 I want to aim at those who feel lost, like the new year isn’t worth going in to….. I know how this feels and I want to share why it’s okay to not know where you’re headed.
Happy Christmas everyone ♡ please look after yourself ♡♡