Posted in mental health, mental health campaigner, Uncategorized

Just a note to you this Sunday evening

There will be someone somewhere this Sunday evening struggling with their mental health.

Depression, anxiety, suicidal feelings – whatever it may be there will be so many people right now struggling.

I wanted to out out a short post. Just a little note from me to you. YOU sitting there right now struggling, feeling hopeless, worthless, like there is nothing left to do, no where left to go.

This is for you.

To tell you that I know it hurts feeling this way. I know it might feel like you’ve tried everything. Nothing is making this any better. That it can’t get any better. I know how much this hurts and the depths of these feelings because I have been there too, many times.

I also sit here now writing this to you knowing that if you give yourself time you will sit there as I sit here now feeling how glad I am that I am no longer in that place. Granted I know that it might sneak up on me again at any time, I not totally free from it’s grasp. The difference is now I have been through that and come through it time and time again I know that I am stronger and better equipped to deal with it next time, to almost watch it from a distance and let it run it’s course.

Nothing lasts forever, everything waxes and wanes and moves in and out like the tide.

This will too, even if it feels it wont.

Be kind to yourself in this time. Do what you need to do to get through. Be gentle with your mind as you would a broken leg. Don’t push it, let it heal and rest.

You will be Okay. These aren’t empty words. Believe me I know. I also know recovery is possible. That means different things to different people but to whatever extent that means for us – you – me, it’s possible.

Hand in there.

It’s going to be alright

x

suicide letter , mental health awareness
Mental health awareness. From me to you
Posted in mental health, mental health campaigner, Uncategorized

Publishing And Puppies!

Don’t be ashamed of your story it will inspire others.

Sharing mental health stories is powerful. There’s a lot to be said for one person’s journey resonating with other human and that is the reason I have wanted to share my story.

Today was a special day as I got the final manuscript back from my editor to pass on to the publisher ♡

It’s been emotional writing and reading and ‘re reading…and ‘re reading my own journey. It’s made me realise what I lost, what I miss but most importantly how far I’ve come.

Putting your story to the world for others to read is both empowering and terrifying.

It’s putting things out there there are personal, That you don’t speak of much, That others may not agree with and that may even tread on others toes.

For me if I was going to share my story. it had to be the truth. My version of events – regardless of who may or may not agree. I wanted it to be raw, honest, no heirs and graces. I didn’t want a fluffy story that sounded poetic but false. It’s about mental illness at its very core and so I wanted it to be real and I hope that it helps someone out there. That will make it worth while.

I have experience with more than one mental illness, a chaotic upbringing and multiple hospital admissions and so it was important to me to portray that messy and seemingly hopeless situation and show that it is possible to achieve normality…..whatever that is and whatever that means to the individual.

I will post updates when it is ready to buy and I hope some of you will read it and find some hope in there that you can relate to ♡♡

katie houghton mental health campaigner author
Katie Houghton -Mental health campaigner – author In Bloom Not Broken

This is something i’ve wanted to do for so many years and somehow makes all that has happened mean something. It’s given me a passion and something to say that I’m now in a place to be able to share.

On a different note today has been the best. Not only have I sent off my manuscript to be a real live book but I’ve been and bought a new puppy to be named Eddie who will be part of our family in four weeks time! I LOVE dogs and already have my 10 year old fur baby who is my best friend and also featured in my book so this little man is a welcome and fitting addition ♡

katie houghton mental health campaigner
Eddie the new addition to our family!

So between puppies and publishing it’s been a fabulous day!

Posted in mental health, mental health campaigner, Uncategorized

Notes Of Hope In Parliament

I was over the moon today to hear that the wonderful MP of Redditch took the issue of my notes of hope being torn down by the council to debate as she is backing this project ♡

This project was for both suicide awareness and suicide prevention and very personal and so I was devastated how it was handled.

This has shown me once again however to believe in yourself, your goals and your vision.

Even if people disagree, go against you and don’t share your goal. Those people are inevitable ….. It’s about finding those that do and will walk by your side.

Posted in mental health, Uncategorized

To You On World Mental Health Day 2018

It’s World Mental Health Day 2018 and it’s great when these dates come around as there is so much more conversation around mental health which can only be a good thing.

It’s also important to remember however that mental health is something we need to be aware of everyday. For ourselves and for those around us. Mental health awareness needs to be there 24/7 the same as our physical health.

For people affected by mental health which is 1 in 4 it’s not exclusive to mental health day, it’s a day to day battle of fighting for ourselves and far too often, our lives.

With the success of my recent campaign “hearts of hope” with personal notes being an effective way of reaching people struggling, for those of you that don’t live local and so haven’t been able to go and get one of my notes and whom haven’t received Happy post from me I wanted to write you a letter here, to anyone that may be struggling and finding things difficult – This is for you.

Dear You,

To the person that feels lonely, scared, ashamed, hopeless and who is struggling today, I want to tell you that you are going to be okay. It may not feel that way now, but it will.

You see I have felt hopeless, lonely and had given up on my life once too. I planned to end my life. I was in so much pain with so much confusion that I didn’t know which way was up. I barely functioned and I battled my way through 15 years of trying to get the right treatment. That may be the last thing you want to hear. 15 years is an awfully long time but there were good times within that too and I battled my way through. It’s not like that for everyone, everyones journey and path is different. Even with the same diagnosis no two people are the same. For you, your journey will be different too, it wont go the way mine did – because you are you and that alone is something to celebrate. There is not another you on this planet – just you – one of a kind and you are all kinds of amazing.

You may be new to struggling with mental health and wondering what you’re supposed to do and may not have told anyone yet how you are feeling. Or like me you may be an old hat and more aware of what is going on and how to manage that better. Wherever you are on that journey however it still hurts the same when it hurts and the black is as black when going through a depression, the delusions are still as scary each time they roll around – Whatever it is that you are struggling with when it’s bad it’s bad and we all cope in our own ways as will you.

What I want you to know today is that I know what it’s like to feel hopeless, I know what it is to break in to a million tiny pieces and feel like it’s impossible to glue all those pieces back together to resemble something called life. I also know that is possible.

Now I’m not perfect. Far from it. I have moods that flail around at times, I have anxiety and that gets the better of me, I still check pointless objects at night as part of an OCD ritual to make sure they are still there. I still take lithium and quetiapine to keep my brain on track and throw in a clonazepam a day to keep the anxiety at bay. There is no such thing as a perfect recovery in mental health. It’s a process of management. Of learning about yourself, what makes you tick, what makes you break, your limits and learning to manage your life and your illness but do you know what? That’s okay!!!! if you’re not there yet then you will be.

You may be thinking “That’s great for her and I’m never going to feel that way” That’s okay too because that’s exactly what I thought when I read things like this, I thought it happened to “other people” and how great that was for them but that I was too broken.

This is why I created the hashtag #InBloomNotBroken which will also hopefully be the title of my book when it’s published because no one is too broken, we are simply in bloom. That means you too.

I nearly ended my life and quirk of fate stopped that from happening and now my god am I glad I didn’t!! I struggle but i’m better than I was, I do things that matter to me, I have a beautiful daughter to see grow up. I may not have the uni degree or the career…I’ve spent so much time in hospital and in the depths of mental illness that wasn’t possible but just because that’s what society tells us is success, actually it’s not. Success derives from happiness in whatever form that will take so screw what anyone thinks – If I have a period where I’m happy and healthy then I deem myself very bloody successful.

You have a purpose. If you feel you don’t then you just haven’t found it yet. You will find it. If you are struggling remember – This isn’t the forever you, it’s just the for now you and you will find the true you again, just give yourself time. Everything needs time, a cold, a flu, a broken leg – Mental Illness is no different.

You will be okay. I promise. Just be gentle with yourself, give yourself time, don’t push yourself to do what you think you should just for that reason alone, listen to your gut, take time for you, listen to yourself and fight for the right help and treatment – you deserve that, don’t put up with being lost in the system.

If you are struggling but haven’t told anyone yet please take the first step of doing this. It’s hard, scary but it’s vital. Holding it back doesn’t nothing but make it grow. Tell a friend, a family member or talk to someone in confidence like the samaritans who you can call free 24 hours a day on 116 123.

Don’t suffer in silence.

Don’t be ashamed to be you.

And don’t be ashamed of your story. One day it will inspire others.

Take care of you

Lots of love

Katie

xxxx

Posted in mental health

Hearts of Hope – From My Heart To Yours

Hearts of hope in Shirley Park – World Mental Health Day 2018

I am so pleased at the response to this project, the converstations around mental health that have taken place surrounding it have been so positive.

Many of the hearts have been taken and hopefully hone to hands that need little hope ♡♡

I will be replenishing them later with another 40 ♡

I decided to make a little video about why I did this project.

You never know who you are speaking to and what they are going through. Every one is potentially fighting a battle you know nothing about.

I wanted to create conversation around mental health particularly in people that need to talk, that need to take that first step in speaking out about how they are feeling and I am very proud that this project seems to have created some of those converstations. ♡♡♡♡

Posted in mental health

Hearts Of Hope – World Mental Health Day 2018

World Mental Health Day 2018 is on Wednesday 10th October.

In aid of this I made 150 handwritten hearts of hope to attach to the entrance of my local park ♡

The aim with this project was to raise awareness on mental illness and create conversation around mental health.

With the help of a few lovely humans who offered to help (who were very much appreciated as it was very cold and I was losing the feeling in my fingers!) We attached all the notes as well as some signs and also some pebbles that I had painted to decorate the entrance of Shirley Park in Shirley, Solihull.

The aim is that people will not only read the notes but that if anyone is themselves struggling with mental health issues or knows someone that is that they will take one or two away as they have been attached so that they are removeable.

 

I was very proud of not only how this looked when all the hearts were up but more Importantly that were people were stopping and reading them within a short space of time and shortly after attaching starring receiving messages about conversations around mental health that had taken place and a few people approached me and spoke openly and that was what it was all about so I feel hopeful for the week or so that they will be up that they will have a positive effect which is awesome and makes it worth while!

I do love a plan that comes together and I am ready thinking about what I can do for nearer to Christmas which can be difficult time for many with mental health issues.

Posted in mental health

Coming Through The Worst Times – Suicide Awareness

Are you ever too “broken” to come through the worst times and planning to end your life?

No. It may seem that way, even truly feel like this is it, this is the end but it doesn’t have to be. It’s possible for things to change even when you’re sure they won’t.

I’ve spoken about this before but I believe it’s an Important topic so I’m touching on it again with the the help of my manuscript.

Sometimes it’s only possible to see how far you have come when you look back. That’s a hard thing to do, but sometimes necessary.

Going through multiple diaries to write my story which I hope to have published was difficult but extremely therapeutic and made me realise what I have been through and just how far I’ve come. Not only that but that even when all hope seems to have gone and you’re utterly spent it’s possibly for things to change.

If you’re reading this and going through depression, anxiety, an eating disorder or a really impossible point of your life please know that things can and do change. You just have to hold on.